In Zombieland. : (

I think the day started out to get me today.
As i type this, i have no idea why all my words are underlined.
Fuck it. Thats not the point of my post.

Results just came out and unfortunately enough,
I have fallen into a state of upset.
Honestly, i did have more faith in this exam.
I studied like shit for it, harder than before, or ever.
I just didnt think i would be squished like a bug despite all the effort.

Poop. I can't NOT swear now.
I always knew i wasn't the book smart type,
But SERIOUSLY?? WTF.
I don't get it, i don't get it, i don't freaking get it.

Its not like i don't care!
Or that i was slacking!!
Or that i miss classes!!!
I attended 98% of them!!
The other 2% was because i was lost, or didn't know.

God... Help me...I'm dying here...
Why is it like this??
Some subjects i just knew the answers!!
I did the best i could!!
Didn't give up till the very end!!
Beeswax. Am i seriously this dumb??
How should i study, hurhh??
How........................................

I tried everything!!
I tried highlighting all the important points...
I listen like a hawk in class except for maths, which i passed!!
I tried studying 2 weeks before the exam (which is pretty early)...
Nope, it still doesnt work.

I wonder why God made us unequal and uneven to one another.
Some friends study 2 or 1 day before the exam,
And poof, they get magical colourful results.
I just want to pass everything, is that really so hard??
For me it is.

I am getting convinced that academics is not what i was born to master.
I need to suffer and experience awful grinding and shit before something turns out "ok".
I dont think i can be taught how to study though...
Because no matter how hard i do, its useless.

So, this is what i intend to do.
If i proceed to UG,
I am going to TAKE IT EASY.
In the sense that i'm not going to fuss over exams anymore,
I'm not going to stress about it weeks before.
I'll just do frequent readings.
THAT is what i'm going to do.

Like daddy said, just get your degree and come out!
The real world is totally different and requires things differently!!
So, i can't wait to freaking graduate!!
I can't wait to show the world, blehhh!!
Street smart takes people places too you know!!

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.....................
I just need to chill.
Chill.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010 at 3:33 AM

3 Comments to "In Zombieland. : ("

Yes, my mind state is currently like your post now. Gosh!!
like that picture btw, need that.

hey2, relax. whats the stress all about?

yes, in our country, the cgpa/grades matters but what matters the most is whether you understand what you are doing.

I was at one point, like you. Did everything I could but still getting what i did not deserve. It took me time to realise that that grades dont really matter; its what you apply matters the most.

Cheer up! Degree may be challenging, so enjoy the most of it! :D

Dont you dare ever think you are stupid.

Exams are nothing, they cant evaluate a person's IQ, it's just a test to see how much you can remember or understand.

And maybe you do understand but the answer you gave wasnt what the teacher was looking for. So dun be too hard on yourself.

I used to think that way too, why others can study so easily and get good grades.

Only later did I realise it's not about memorizing well, but understanding and finding your very own study method.

Just hang in there, and try all diff types of studying method to find the one that suits you best.

You can do it, trust me.
Just set a lower goal for yourself at this very state, and see yourself improve one step at the time k ???


I am always here to hear you out ^^

HUGS**